Wednesday, August 2, 2006

If God Had Voice Mail

If God Had Voice Mail

Thank you for calling heaven.

I am sorry, all of our angels and saints are busy helping other sinners right now. However, your prayer is important to us and we will answer it in the order it was received. Please stay on the line.

If you would like to speak to:
God, press 1.
Jesus, press 2.
The Holy Spirit, press 3.
If you would like to hear King David sing a Psalm while you are holding, press 4.

To find a loved one who has been assigned to Heaven, press 5, then enter his or her social security number followed by the pound sign. (If you get a negative response, please hang up and try area code 666.)For reservations in heaven, please enter J-O-H-N 3:16  And you will hear the following message:  For God So loved the world that He gave his only begotten son, that whosoever belieth in him should not perish but have everlasting life!!!!  Isn't that the best news you have heard all day!!!!

For answers to nagging questions about dinosaurs, the age of the earth, life on other planets, and where Noah's Ark is, please wait until you arrive.

If you are calling after hours and need emergency assistance, please contact your local pastor.
I have my reservation....do you?

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

That is brilliant ~ loved the 666 ~ Ally

Anonymous said...

yep; there is a mansion being prepared for me even as we speak.

betty

Anonymous said...

hehehe - you'll have to dial the 666 area code if you are looking for me. :-D

How silly, I loved  it.

Amanda :)
http://journals.aol.com/trickeytricky/CountryMyKindaLivin

Anonymous said...

this is good

Anonymous said...

Too funny!
I have my reservation!!
Have a great rest of the week!
Linda :)

Anonymous said...

great one.  great sis too.
I believe that God put on  Earth to accomplish a certain number of things.  Right now I am so far behind, I will never die.  
Love ya, Barb  

Anonymous said...

Cute! So was the previous entry. I'm skipping school this morning! Thought I'd get caught up on your journal and others before I do anything else.
Naughty Martha :-)

Anonymous said...

so very true dear. For Marla press #22

Anonymous said...

Good laughs, thanks!  Cathy